i hate crying in front of people so if i have ever cried in front of you, yes it does kinda mean you’re important but mostly it means it was a terrible accident that i will regret forever
when i die, cremate me and put my ashes into the pepper shakers at my favorite restaurant
what the fuck
(it’s red lobster)
christmas is so much worse as you get older it’s like “what do you want this year?” “a sense of purpose”
"a career" "financial security" "a sex life" "tuition for grad school" "alcohol" "a nap" "socks would be nice"
NEVER put a photo of a man with a bald head on the front page of a newspaper!
when i meet up with my friends i tell them im already on my way when im actually still choosing what clothes to wear
what the fuckc was spy kids anyway
kudos to mtv for spreading this message tho
Turn the fuck up MTV
Yes, it does.
Guys get morning wood because our bladders fill up during the night and begin to press against our prostate, causing arousal. Our dicks don’t just feel the sun coming up and think “My time has come”
you deserve someone who isn’t embarrassed to love you and tells all their friends about you and saves your selfies, whether they’re good or bad to look at when they miss you and loses sleep to talk to you and tells you how much they love you and how beautiful you are all the time and i really hope you find that one day because you deserve to be loved